Raja Kita,Selamat Berta-ta!(Waving Goodbye)

"God save the Queen,the facist regime,it makes you a moron,potential H bombs!"
-Sex Pistols.

I'm keen to continue my theory to be republic,especially for Malaysian people.

I laughed like fuck when a Malay friend told me that "kita perlukan raja sebab rajalah yang akan terus menaungi orang-orang Melayu di Malaysia.Kalau takde raja,republik,matilah kita bangsa Melayu,kena pijak".

And I replied,"sekarang bangsa Melayu hidup ke?Come on la,people in France throw their king and they become superpower.Hello,English tu pun,dah yang nak tubuhkan Republic of Britain tu dah sampai 30 percent dah.Some cities in Liverpool and Manchester masing-masing dah declare Republic of Scousers and Republic of Mancunia."

OK,everything started when friend of mine(BN hardcore) saying to me "ada ke patut meeting bawah pokok?Kat Canada mana ada,kan?Dorang ni gila la".

I replied back,"they all meeting kat pokok pasal police suka-suka nak tutup DUN.Ikut law based on Westminster(then I opened my Westminster law books,then I recited it),it's approved to have convenance even not inside Parliament for emergency matters.Ye la,kalau Parlimen terbakar macam mana nak meeting kat dalam?"

Then he replied "itu kalau terbakar.Masalahnya ni tiba-tiba meeting,dah Sultan tak approve,mana boleh?"

"Who need Sultan?They all wakil rakyat,bukan wakil sultan.Since rakyat nak persidangan tu,they all kena buat.Mahathir dulu jugak cakap,kalau tak sign around 14 days rule tu dah legitimate.So,benda yang sama jugak yang they all buat.If Sultan refuses to sign,then 14 days from law passed by Parliment/DUN,sah la!"

He then get emotional,"Hey,you ni orang Melayu ke?Even though you ada mixed Irish-Turkish,you still orang Melayu,okay?"

I'm replied "Hello,Ireland is a republic.Turkey is a republic.My dad anchestor is Bugis.Bugis is from Indonesia.Indonesia is a republic.None of my blood were from a monarch country okay?"

He trapped.He then replied,"tapi still orang Malaysia kan?"

"Nope,I'm Canadian.Je suis Canadienne."

Once again he getting emotional,"lupa daratan".

"You la lupa daratan.Asal orang Indonesia tapi tak nak mengaku anchestor sendiri.Siap halau-halau lagi."

He then replied,"habis,you nak Tanah Melayu jadi macam Singapore ke?"

"Yup." I replied short.

"Gila!Nak Cina conquer?"

"Cina conquer?Hello,it's an international city okay?You ingat semua Chinese yang control Singapore tu ke?American,British,French,Australian,Japanese..you name it,semua ada kat situ."

"Habis tu Lee Kuan Yew?Dia Perdana Menteri Singapore!"

"So?Kalau dia Perdana Menteri Singapore,kenapa?Tak boleh?People yang elect dia,sukati they all la."

"Nanti Melayu terpinggir,macam kat Singapore.Merempat kat bumi sendiri."

"Siapa cakap?I ada raaaaaamai kawan Singaporean.Bersepah.Pasir Ris,Pasir Panjang,Bukit Batuk,Yishun,Kalau I flight turun Changi ramai yang boleh I contact,what's a problem?They all okay je.Dapat kerja.Dapat makan.Dapat tidur.So?"

"Semua Melayu duduk kat rumah-rumah flat sempit." he replied with short idea.

"Hello,tanah Singapore tu memang la sempit.Memang semua duduk flat.Chinese pun duduk flat,what's a problem?Yang kat Malaysia,pergi la Jalan Pekeliling tu,duduk flat jugak.Ada lagi ke Jalan Pekeliling tu?hik hik!"

"Yang tu dah kat tengah bandar,nak buat macam mana?"

"Habis tu Singapore tu macam Felda Kuala Jenahak ke?"

He silent.And very-very pissed off at me.

"Alias,patutnya you cakap macam ni,takde rakyat,mati raja.Pasal raja tak dapat duit from rakyat.Kenapa la you ni,sorry to say,timid sangat?"

"Kita dah ada raja zaman-berzaman Ezreen,kenapa semua Melayu nak buang raja ni?"

"Pasal orang Melayu zaman sekarang dah buka mata Alias.Look at Russia,Czar they all,raja they all duduk kat Ipatiev Palace tu sejak Nabi Isa hidup lagi.Look at China,Emperor they all sejak zaman Mesolitik lagi.Tapi bila rakyat dah bukak mata,they don't need this rubbish anymore."

"Don't call my king rubbish Ezreen!Jangan cabar orang Melayu!"

"I cabar orang-orang so called Melayu ni Alias.Cuba jadi republik,boleh tak?"

"Nak jadi macam Indonesia?"

"Why not?They are future giants.Believe me,they will."

"Future economy giant?Sekarang pun merempat kat Malaysia."

"Merempat?20 years ago orang-orang hanyut Vietnam merempat kat Malaysia jugak.Now,more and more big companies bukak company kat Vietnam."

"Itu Vietnam,ini Indonesia."

"Vietnam ada 80 million people.Indonesia ada 230 million.Ada tanah luas lagi somemore.And Vietnam also a republic."

"Kenapa you insist sangat nak republic ni Ezreen?Gila ke nak buang raja?"

"Haha,you la gila Alias.OK,jangan ambik contoh negara republik.Ambik negara bukan republik.Spain,Juan Carlos.Britain,Queen E.Sweden,Carl Gustav.Japan,Hirohito.Thailand,Bhomibol Adulyadej.Semua satu je raja.Malaysia?Syed Putra,Sultan Halim,Sultan Azlan,Sultan Sarafuddin,Tuanku Munawir of Negeri Sembilan,Temenggong Johor Sultan Iskandar,Sultan Ahmad,Sultan Mizan,Sultan Ismail Petra,dah la negara kecik,lepas tu ada 9 raja.9 raja tu kena rakyat bayar cukai.Malaysia bukannya kaya macam Spain or Sweden,or strong economy macam Japan.You la gila nak ada raja banyak-banyak.Hello,raja-raja kat Indonesia tu,Mataram,Deli,Riau,Minangkabau,Makassar..semua dah buang.Yang tinggal pun Sri Hamangkubuwono.Itu pun just ketua adat.Takde kuasa pun nak memerintah.Sign pun tak laku.Sign Presiden yang laku."

"Kesimpulannya Alias,the world is changing.I tanya you,polis zaman sekarang tak pakai keris dan tanjak macam temenggong kat tepi Sungai Melaka.They all pakai baret dan pistol.Orang sekarang berkembang,takkan nak jadi kolot macam dulu?And let me tell you frank,Alias,I don't give a damn.I don't give a damn about Malay sultanate institution.It's bored.Rakyat lagi la bosan.So,either you change,or you boleh simpan otak you kat Muzium Negara".

Oh ya,let me sing Negaraku,new version.

Negaraku
Tanah tumpahnya darahku
Rakyat hidup bersatu dan maju
Rahmat bahagia Tuhan kurniakan
Raja kita selamat berta-ta..bye bye!

p/s:dengar Shayna Zaid lagi best!Poyo je orang gila tanjak ni..hik hik!

another p/s:The only raja I love is raja sehari.Where I can eat nasi beriyani.Free!